Series 2, Episode 4
Written by Jayne Hollinson
Produced by Brian Park
Directed by Laurence Moody
Air Date: 25th April, 2000
Hollamby is playing the martyr more than ever, this time parading around wearing a surgical collar. She’s hamming it up big time and demands that a full investigation is launched into her fall down the stairs otherwise she’ll take the matter up with the union. An unsympathetic Karen reminds Hollamby that an investigation has already been carried out and that nobody saw anything. Not content with putting Hollamby in her place and keeping her there, Karen is also showing Fenner that she’s not a woman to be messed with. She makes a point of assigning him tasks that would normally be performed by a more junior officer, namely, the supervision of urine testing.
Zandra is suffering from a headache of epic proportions and winds everyone up by constantly moaning about it. Dominic assumes that the headache may be drug related and tries to convince Zandra to stop taking them whilst she still can.
Fenner informs Karen that he is starting grievance procedures against her, claiming “unprofessional conduct”. He threatens to tell Stubberfield about their sexual liasion and is disappointed when she doesn’t seem bothered. Later, over a game of golf, Fenner complains about Karen’s behaviour to Stubberfield, claiming that she has got it in for him because they went to bed together at the conference. Fenner is gutted when Stubberfield tells him that Karen had already informed him of their past and then suggests that he should not “try to have his cake and eat it”. Realising that he’s boxed himself in a corner, Fenner backs down and informs Karen that he is dropping his complaint against her. Karen already knows about Fenner’s game of golf with Stubberfield and tells him that she doesn’t trust him and that she’ll be ready when he next steps out of line.
Dominic is now Shell’s personal officer and she begins to flirt heavily with him. She entices him into her cell by claiming to have seen cockroaches and removes her dressing gown to give him a “personal welcome”. Predictably, Dominic runs a mile and then reports Shell’s behaviour. Later, Karen tries to talk some sense into Shell, telling her that she’s worth more than that.
Denny is still worried about the fact that her mum, Jessie, didn’t turn up for her last visit. Her fears are later confirmed when she discovers that Jessie is recovering in hospital after being hit by a car. Karen agrees to allow Di to accompany Denny to the hospital. At the hospital, Di chips in a fiver to help Denny buy a bunch of roses for Jessie. But when they get to the ward they discover that Jessie has already discharged herself. They go to Jessie’s hostel in Hackney to find her but she’s not there either. Di leads a dejected Denny to a nearby taxi rank but on their way, they spot Jessie in the park. She is drunk after having blown Yvonne’s money on alcohol. Denny tries to talk to Jessie but she is abusive, telling Denny that she is nothing but trouble and that she never wanted her in the first place.
Josh is still trying to defrost an extremely icy Crystal without much success. He gives Denny a letter to pass on and Crystal is quite touched until she sees him talking to Shell in the exercise yard. Shell comes on to Josh but he turns her down. The Julies overhear a conversation in which Crystal accuses Josh of chatting Shell up. They decide to matchmake by arranging a romantic, candlelit dinner for Crystal and Josh in the laundry room. With a little help from Zandra and Yvonne, the dinner is a success and Crystal even allows Josh to hold her hand.
Denny is really upset and Yvonne tries to comfort her, telling her that you can’t buy people’s love and that she needs to have self-respect before others will respect her. Later, Jessie turns up to visit Denny and apologises for her behaviour, she also promises to give up drinking and go into detox. Denny has other ideas, she tells Jessie that she doesn’t want to see her for a whole year and, if she’s still sober after all that time, they can try and rebuild their relationship again.
Karen has organised some group therapy sessions for the inmates and Denny, Zandra and Shell are put forward to attend. Hollamby is as critical as ever but Karen is quick to slap her down. Meanwhile, Fenner has realised that it’s every man for himself and approaches Yvonne, offering her and her husband a private visit in exchange for cash.
Shell – “Just thought I’d give you a personal welcome seeing as you’re my personal officer.”
Julie J, Julie S – (To the tune of ‘Frere Jacques’) “Bloody rubbish, bloody rubbish, place is this, place is this. Bodybag and Fenner, who’ll give me a tenner to wipe ‘em out, wipe ‘em out.”
Shell – “My dressing-gown just slipped off. It’s not a crime having a slippy dressing-gown is it?”
Julie S – “’Ere Yvonne, you couldn’t get ‘old of a candle could ya?”
Yvonne – “A candle? If you’re that desperate I could think of something better.”
Fenner – “Men are vulnerable in women’s prisons…aren’t they Dom?”
Yvonne – “Do I detect the ever so faint whiff of corruption?”