Series 5, Episode 11

Written by Di Burrows
Produced by David Crean
Directed by Laurence Moody

Air Date: 17th July, 2003


Snowball is dead, having hanged herself from the G-wing balcony. She left a note making some serious accusations about Fenner, which in light of the allegations of assault already made against him by Karen and her predecessor Helen Stewart, could get him into serious trouble. But everything’s not quite as it seems, and when a second note written by Snowball is found behind the noticeboard in her cell, asserting that she was forced to make up the allegations against Fenner and that Karen is really to blame, it looks like Fenner has got off scot-free yet again.

Karen, on the other hand, is in deep trouble – Snowball’s very public death is just the latest in a long line of suspicious incidents on G-wing since Karen’s been in charge. She’s survived demotion before, but this time it could be that she’s forced to leave Larkhall altogether.

Neil and Tony are faced with the reality that Di is expecting a child by one of them. Di has already made the decision to go through with a termination, but Neil and Tony have other ideas. And with the position of Wing Governor about to become vacant at Larkhall, Neil now has a useful bargaining tool. Di is dismissive at first, but after trying Karen’s office out for size she changes her mind and agrees to go ahead with the pregnancy, provided of course that she receives a healthy divorce settlement as well as promotion to wing governor.

While Julie S receives a visit from the breast nurse and then goes with Julie J to get her hair cut, the rest of the wing prepare a surprise party to cheer her up. As Denny, Tina and Al decorate the wing with balloons and streamers, Yvonne sets up a bar in the four-bed dorm complete with an illicit stash of vodka. However, Julie S has just gone through the trauma of being fitted with a false breast and is upset when she sees the signs of celebration on the wing, telling the others that she’s had one too many surprises recently. A tearful conversation with Julie J helps Julie S to come to terms with the events of the day, and, realising that the other women only want to cheer her up, she decides to join the party.

After Lauren’s henchmen discover a stash of heroin in Hedges’ flat and a mystery blonde in his bed, Yvonne tells him to get lost. Hedges maintains his innocence, telling Yvonne that the woman, Tasha, is his smack-addicted ex-girlfriend – he has allowed her to stay in his flat as she has nowhere else to go. Yvonne thaws slightly when she hears this and then completely melts when Hedges informs her that he has given Tasha her marching orders. Later, they meet in the laundry room, as they kiss; they are unaware of Tina taking photographs of them with a camera given to her by Fenner.

Al receives a letter from the CPS informing her that she will go on trial for the murder of Virginia O’Kane in three weeks time.

Julie S goes to the hospital to receive her test results and is told that there are no signs of the cancer spreading any further, but, there is a possibility that it may return, even after a course of chemotherapy. Julie is horrified when she is told that if the cancer does return, she may only have up to five years to live.

Realising that it’s only a matter of time before she’s gone and he’s back in a suit, Fenner feels safe enough to taunt Karen about her shortcomings as wing governor. However, as Fenner soon finds out, she’s down but definitely not out and his jaw hits the floor as she announces her intention to visit Shell Dockley at Fossmore in order to get her side of the story. Karen’s triumph is short-lived though; Neil calls her to his office and fires her.


Karen – “Don’t piss around with suspensions and pay-offs, just sack the bastard!”
Neil – “We’ve only got this note to go on!”
Karen – “Who’s always right in the middle of every shit-storm at Larkhall? Jim Fenner! His whole career’s been based on sleaze.”

Julie S – “When do I get to choose my wig?”
Nurse – “We’ll sort all that out for you if and when you need it.”
Julie S – “I’ll need it.”
Julie J – “She’ll need it.”
Julie S – “Don’t want to end up looking like Ken Dodd do I Jue? Be better off getting you to knit me a bobble-hat.”

Hollamby – “I’m sure it’ll all come out in the wash.”
Fenner – “This is my future on the line here, not your bleeding laundry.”

Fenner – “You think you’ve won, don’t you? Well think again darling…I’ll still be here while you’re bagging groceries at ‘Tesco’s’.”
Karen – “Yeah, like a rat in a corner.”
Fenner – “There’s no way a rancid old slag like you’s gonna finish me off.”
Karen – “Scratch the surface and that toxic, misogynist shit keeps oozing out.”

Julie J – “I’m sorry Jue.”
Julie S – “Don’t you be sorry. If it weren’t for you, I’d still have all this cancer growing inside me. It’s ‘cause of you I plucked up the courage to do something about it.”
Julie J – “Is that a good thing then?”
Julie S – “I’m saying I’d rather live with a jelly-bag down me bra than be dead with a matching pair mate.”

Detective – “So it’s fair to say that you’ve had it in for him ever since.”
Karen – “All I’m bloody guilty of is getting used by lying bastards!”

Fenner – “Still here? If I were you I’d jump before I was pushed.”
Karen – “Well you’re not me.”
Fenner – “Thank Christ! Wouldn’t want to be in your sling-backs.”
Karen – “There’s no witnesses, no forensics, no nothing, all they’ve got is the words of a dead woman.”
Fenner – “No smoke though, and let’s face it, you’ve hardly had a glorious reign what with suicides, riots oh yeah, and that little bomb that nearly splattered the governor.”
Karen – “I have worked my bloody arse off for these women.”
Fenner – “Tell that to Area.”
Karen – “Oh don’t worry, I will do, along with whatever I find out from Shell Dockley when I go to Fossmore next week. You remember Shell; gobby blonde who got carted out in a strait-jacket because she wouldn’t put out for you anymore.”

Julie S – “I get me results and then start having the chemo…feeling sick and tired and going bald, be like all me Christmases have come at once!”
Di – “It does sound awful. Have you tried fresh stem ginger in hot water? I use it all the time for my…”
Julie S – “Yeah, thanks Miss I’ll bear that in mind. Jue, make a note, I only want ginger nuts with me tea for dunking from now on, not digestives…okay?”

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It has been announced that Kate O'Mara - aka Virginia O'Kane - has passed away.

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