Series 5, Episode 13

Written by Liz Lake
Produced by David Crean
Directed by Jim Loach

Air Date: 31st July, 2003


Di and Hedges arrive at Hollamby’s flat for dinner. Hedges is uncomfortable to say the least, having to cope with Di’s very obvious advances, and the little DIY jobs that Hollamby keeps coming up with him to do. Hollamby and Hedges are both concerned by the volume of alcohol Di knocks back during the evening, not to mention the cigarette she cadges off Hedges. After the meal, Di makes her move and practically attacks Hedges as he emerges from the toilet; he successfully manages to fend her off, telling her that he has a girlfriend.

Bev and Phyl take the phrase ‘open’ prison a little too literally, by missing their curfew and heading to the most expensive restaurant they can find. When Phyl’s bogus credit card is refused, they manage to wrap the young waiter around their little fingers, promising him that they will go straight home and arrange to have some cash “biked” over. Meanwhile, the alarm has gone up at Barkwith Hall and just as Bev and Phyl are about to leave the restaurant, they are apprehended by two POs.

Fenner gets Tina’s pictures developed, but is in for a shock when he doesn’t see the picture of Yvonne he expected. Karen, who is in receipt of a totally different set of photographs, wastes no time in calling Tina to her office and asking her to sign a statement of sexual harassment against him. Tina is terrified of what Fenner might do to her and maintains that she was the one who came onto him, however, Karen is firm, telling Tina that whatever happened before the photograph was taken, Fenner has still abused his position and anyway, she’ll make sure that Tina is safely out of the way on a home visit when the shit hits the fan.

Al meets with her lawyer for her forthcoming murder trial. When her lawyer scratches beneath the surface to uncover a traumatic childhood there could be a way to get her off the murder wrap – but can Al confront the past to save her future?

Karen goes to Neil with all of the evidence she’s collected against Fenner. Although he’s dismissive about the photographs, Neil is aghast when he finds out about Hedges’ affidavit and the real reason Shell had her baby taken away from her. Karen is all for suspending Fenner immediately but Neil insists that they hang fire until he’s had time to write a report outlining all of the charges against Fenner. Karen is furious and decides to write her own report – she’ll take that and the evidence she’s collected straight to Area in the morning.

Already stinging from Hedges’ rejection, Di goes into orbit when she discovers that Karen might not be leaving Larkhall after all. Even threatening to get rid of the baby doesn’t change Neil’s mind – as far as he’s concerned, the only person responsible for denying her the wing governor job is Fenner – it’s not Neil’s fault that Karen has collected a dossier of irrefutable evidence against him. Meanwhile, Fenner is slowly coming to realise that something strange is going on – Tina has been sent on a home visit and Hedges is up and down to the governor’s office like a yo-yo. He doesn’t realise how much trouble he’s really in until Di takes him to one side and tells him about Karen’s evidence against him.

Henry and Barbara continue to make plans for their wedding, even though that, thanks to the part she played in taking Christopher Biggins hostage, she has lost any chance she had of an early release. Realising that he is unable to wait, Henry decides to resign and then ask for special permission for them to get married in the prison.

While Karen is in the shower, Fenner breaks into her flat and examines all of the evidence she has against him. After stealing the photographs, negatives and Hedges’ affidavit, he leaves the flat but not before picking up her car keys, coat and a bottle of alcohol. After stealing Karen’s car, Fenner drives to a secluded location and puts on make-up and a long, blonde wig. He then takes to the streets and drives erratically, eventually succeeding in knocking someone over. Later, after ditching the car and leaving the now empty bottle of alcohol on the front seat, he makes good his escape.

New officer Selena Geeson starts work at Larkhall, and, after massaging Neil’s ego during her induction meeting, succeeds in getting her preferred posting on the lifers’ unit. After showing Selena around the wing, Di sends her down to reception to learn the ropes from Hollamby whose face lights up when Phyl and Bev are escorted off the meat-wagon and into – this is a prime opportunity for her to get her own back and she begins making their life as miserable as possible by pulling on the latex gloves in order to show Selena how to do a thorough strip-search. However, Hollamby’s balloon is popped when she witnesses Phyl and Bev being cheered back onto the wing like celebrities.

After waking up to find that her car has been stolen, Karen is forced to take a taxi into work where an even more unwelcome surprise is waiting for her. The police have found her car and have reason to believe that it was used in a fatal hit and run incident the previous night. Karen is aghast and accuses Fenner of setting her up, he just watches in silence as she is arrested for causing death by dangerous driving and dragged off the wing.


Fenner – “What are you up to you conniving bitch?”
Karen – “Pots and kettles Jim.”
Fenner – “Don’t prick me about! Getting O’Kane out of the road, secret meetings all day, you’re at it big time! I’m not a bloody idiot.”
Karen – “Yes you are Fenner, if you think you can get away with all the years of lying, abuse and rape. I am having you, you bastard!”
Fenner – “Your credit’s run out darling; no one believes a single word you say anymore.”
Karen – “I’ve got it all – photos, statements, the lot. I’ve even got that wanker Grayling on my side and you know it or you wouldn’t be here right now.”
Fenner – “I’ll bloody kill you.”
Karen – “Your balls are going on my mantelpiece Jim. I’m putting it all in a big, fat file for Area…on behalf of Rachel Hicks, Helen Stewart, Nikki Wade, Shell Dockley and every other poor cow you’ve ruined in your miserable excuse for a life. Now get the hell out of my office!”

Henry – “Please don’t change your mind. If you’d rather wait until after your release…”
Barbara – “I never change my mind. I just can’t believe that being in this hellhole has brought me so much happiness…talk about moving in mysterious ways.”

Fenner – “Welcome to Larkhall love.”
Selena – “Cheers…love.”

Buki – “You said yourself, you’re obviously guilty innit?”
Al – “Maybe there’s reasons I done it.”
Buki – “Too right, you’re a frigging nutter!”

Hollamby – “It’s the bag ladies you end up dreading, you have to hose them down, stinking they are and crawling with lice…give me an old serial killer any day, as long as she knows what a bar of soap is.”

Yvonne – “Well if it isn’t the Costa Cons!”
Hollamby – “Costa fortune more like.”

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