Series 6, Episode 7

Written by Helen Eatock
Produced by Cameron Roach
Directed by Ian White

Air Date: 18th May, 2004


Fenner is back on the wing after recovering from his mental breakdown but it doesn’t take him long to get his confidence back. He goes to confront Neil and reminds him about a few false promises he once made about the wing governor’s job and being in line for governing governor. Neil is confused, especially when Fenner produces a notebook and pen and writes down everything that is said. Meanwhile, the women are up in arms when Fenner reappears on the wing.

Tanya is determined to put pressure on Darlene to meet with Rick before they both get into serious trouble. But things become complicated when Darlene is carted off to the hospital wing. Tanya pretends to fall ill to gain access to the hospital wing and then allows Dr Nicholson to grope her in exchange for five minutes alone with Darlene. Rick has managed to smuggle a tape into Tanya and she gives it to Darlene. Later, Darlene listens to the tape on a walkman and hears her brother Terence being tortured and begging her to stop it.

Tina is guilt-ridden, convinced that she killed Al by giving her the rhubarb hooch. When she hears this, Natalie goes to confront Phyl and Bev. She catches them in the act of flushing the evidence down the loo and tells them that unless they tell her everything, she’ll report them to Frances. It turns out that while reading her gardening book, Phyl found out that rhubarb leaves were poisonous. She and Bev spiked the POs milk and then were horrified when Julie S borrowed it to make pancakes. Natalie orders Bev to pour the remaining poison into Frances’s coffee. Meanwhile, Phyl plants evidence in Tanya’s hamper.

Fenner tries to talk the Julies round. He proclaims his innocence, telling them that he was scared of Yvonne and her connections on the outside. He compares himself to Natalie, pointing out that the Julies thought the worst of her too but were ultimately proved wrong. Fenner also points the finger in Colin’s direction, claiming that he killed Yvonne because she dumped him. Although dismissive at first, both Julies become suspicious when Colin tells them that he is leaving Larkhall. Julie J confronts him, telling him of Fenner’s accusations. Colin reveals the real reason for his leaving Larkhall and begs Julie J to keep it a secret.

Someone slips a note under the PO’s office door, instructing them to look inside Tanya’s hamper for the cause of the mystery virus. Although Neil thinks the note is a hoax, Frances takes it seriously and orders the DST to examine the now confiscated hamper. Frances sips her coffee as she watches the DST officer at work, unaware that Bev has spiked it with a lethal dose.

Frances has now become the G-Wing poisoner’s latest victim and is lying on her sickbed when Neil phones to tell her that Al’s post mortem results are back – she died of oxalic poisoning, the most common source of which is rhubarb leaves. Blood tests are being taken from every inmate who was affected. The DST have also found evidence of tampering in Tanya’s hamper. Frances is immediately suspicious – she fell ill after the hamper was confiscated.

The following morning, Bev overhears Neil telling the POs that Frances is the poisoner’s latest victim and assumes that this means Natalie’s plan has worked – Frances is dead. The next phase of their plan now goes into operation. To deflect suspicion, Natalie ingests enough poison to make her ill and as she is carted off to the hospital wing, Phyl drops heavy hints to the Julies regarding the fact that nobody fell ill until Tanya turned up.

Meanwhile, Tanya persuades Darlene to tell her where she stashed the bag she stole from Rick. She wants to send someone to pick it up before Rick can get there. Reluctantly, Darlene tells her that the bag is in a left-luggage locker near Manor Park and gives her the locker number and combination. Later, she receives a visit from Rick and gives him the same information.

The women confront Tanya with their suspicions but are soon distracted when Frances walks onto the wing. She’s still very much alive, contrary to Natalie’s plans, and the mere sight of her causes Bev to fall into a dead faint. With the rest of the wing distracted, Tanya seizes her chance and makes a break for the phone, she has just enough time to pass on the relevant information before Frances ends the call. Frances has a police detective in tow and he is here to arrest Tanya for murder.


Di – “Let’s hope you’re right ma’am.”
Frances – “Are you sure you don’t mean you hope I’m wrong Di?”

Julie J – “Oi Fenner! Didn’t recognise you with your clothes on!”

Bev – “We never realised that rhubarb leaves were poisonous, I mean, not until Phyl read it in her gardening book.”
Phyl – “Highly toxic for goats and swine, one obviously supposed likewise for screws.”

Bev – “When I saw the screw’s milk heading off to make pancakes for our breakfast I nearly gave birth to my liver.”

Di – “Oh don’t say you’ve been struck down by this virus too!”
Frances – “It’s not a bloody virus.”
Di – “What is it then?”
Frances – “Deadly spores from the alien spaceship.”
Di – “Well, we never had anything like this kind of hassle when I was running G-Wing.”
Frances – “And Neil sacked you, what a vote of confidence!”

Julie S – “A screw is a screw is a lying bastard…no exceptions.”

Bev – “Call me a liar and a thief, but that one is a 24 carat, cold-hearted criminal.”
Phyl – “Well don’t spare any pity for Myers, the merciless way she humiliated me, I hope she’s writhing on the lavatory when she croaks it.”

Dr Nicholson – “It’s rare to have a patient of your type waiting for me.”
Tanya – “And what type’s that Doctor?”
Dr Nicholson – “Pretty, sexy, intelligent.”
Tanya – “That’s right. Far too intelligent to let a fat little pervert like you to try and paw me to death.”

Julie J – “Colin, you better listen to me ‘cause there’s a nasty rumour going around that we blamed the wrong screw for Yvonne’s death.”
Colin – “Fenner started it did he? Well flashing his tackle must have won him a real fan club.”

Bev – “News update, Myers is no longer with us.”
Phyl – “Bev! Come on, this is a moment to savour. They’re absolutely certain?”
Bev – “Well, obviously I haven’t seen the death certificate but I know what it’s going to say re cause of.”
Phyl – “I can see the tombstone – Here lies Frances Myers, tragically lopped down in her youth by a bunch of rhubarb!”

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