Series 8, Episode 8

Written by Phil Ford
Produced by Sharon Houlihan
Directed by Jim Loach

Air Date: 31st August, 2006


Tina is still in shock after inadvertently killing a man during her bungled bank hold-up. Plagued with guilt, she’s delivered back to Larkhall but the despair becomes too much for her and she tries to take her own life. Things get worse for Tina when she hears that the widow of the man who died during the bank raid has asked to meet her. Tina is terrified, sure that the woman is going to rip her to shred for causing the death of her husband. However, Mrs Fisk has a secret that will leave Tina feeling a lot better about the accident, her late husband was a vicious bully and she’s glad that he’s dead. Over the years, she fed her husband fatty, cholesterol laden food in the hopes that his heart would give out and never dreamed that someone else would be involved when it finally happened. His death is not Tina’s fault and she’s desperately sorry. Tina tells Mrs Fisk not to worry, everything has turned out for the best…she’s back where she belongs.

Lou is furious with Rowan for leading her on. Although he denies that he is still with his wife, claiming that she is a manic depressive and that he has to play along with her delusions, Lou’s instincts are telling her that he’s lying. Rowan is determined to prove her wrong and Lou is stunned when he pops the question. Meanwhile, Lou’s sister, Vicky is out of rehab and Lou has engineered her a job teaching music to the girls on G-Wing. Her first lesson is a huge success and Lou is extremely relieved, so much so that she volunteers to judge the ‘Prison Idol’ competition that Vicky has arranged. The girls pull out all the stops, but in the end there is one obvious winner—Tina.

Pat is sweating over what to do with Natalie—she knows she’ll have to move it from the tumble dryer, as a hot laundry is no place to hide a festering corpse. When Pat suddenly stumbles on a disused manhole behind a washing machine, she is hopeful she has found a solution. However, the manhole cover proves impossible to shift and once again, she has to turn to the Julies for help. Just as they are about to move Natalie, a maintenance man arrives to fix the ‘broken’ dryer. The Julies engineer a sink blockage in the servery to distract him while Pat levers open the manhole cover and soon, Natalie’s decomposing corpse is sent to a watery grave in Larkhall’s sewers.

Janine is desperate for more passion with Donny. When they are almost caught at it in an empty classroom, Donny’s professional conscience kicks in and he puts the brakes on their relationship. Janine is devastated when he tells her that he thinks they should cool things down—it’s clear that he cares about his job more than he does her. Later, Donny proves he is 100% committed by persuading Lou to allow Janine to visit her mum’s grave as a reward for her recent good behaviour. Janine is ecstatic when Donny arrives with the good news, especially when she hears that he will be the PO escorting her.

Vicky wouldn’t trust Rowan as far as she could throw him and, convinced that he’s stringing Lou along, ransacks his office in search of his home address. Rowan receives the shock of his life when he arrives home to find Vicky drinking tea with his wife, Hannah. His secret is now well and truly out—Hannah is pregnant! Rowan reveals to Vicky that that he always planned to let Lou down gently after the babies were born, but he’s now reliant on her support for his documentary and can’t do anything that might rock the boat. It appears that Rowan has Vicky’s measure and he proceeds to buy her silence by offering her a regular supply of drugs. The temptation is just too much for Vicky to stand.


Hollamby – “My father refused to call The Beatles music, goodness only knows what he’d make of hop-hip and garbage.”

Vicky – “You all have to choose a song that means something to you.”
Phyl – “How about ‘Unchained Melody’?”

Hollamby – “Men who treat their wives worse than cattle deserve a ticket to the abattoir.”

Julie J – “Ain’t you gonna say a prayer or summink?”
Pat – “Rest in shit, you bitch.”

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